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Self Help: How to Master Speaking Nerves

Lisa, how can I come across as a better speaker?

When I speak to people I worry that I don't come across as articulate, smart, and confident. I want to be eloquent. I find that when people ask me questions, I'm usually caught off guard and it takes me awhile to reply.

It's even worse when I'm talking to someone in a position of authority. What can I do?

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MY COMMENTS
I can relate to this question. I mean, who HASN'T freaked out in a meeting at least once?

I'm going to keep my answer VERY simple. but don't let this fool you. It's still a PRICELESS 4 step formula for success when speaking.

STEP ONE
When you are alone, rehearse out loud the EXACT words you are going to use to present your ideas. Most people assume that articulate people are spontaneous. This is rarely the case.

Virtually all top performances are heavily rehearsed. Even improv performers on shows like "Whose Line Is It Anyway" work very hard to perfect their delivery.

You need to do the same.

STEP TWO
When you are preparing for the meeting, imagine you are already at the scene. Visualize the scenario in your mind. Hopefully, you will get a little nervous, and then you can work on your nerves before you get there.

STEP THREE
Once you are nervous, try saying the following to yourself: "It's OK to be nervous. It's OK to be afraid of making mistakes."

This will relax you because you aren't forcing yourself to try and feel confident when you aren't. You're just trying to accept yourself.

STEP FOUR
When you are in the meeting, stop paying attention to how you feel. Instead, pay attention to what's happening in the meeting. What's being discussed?

If you are giving a presentation, make sure you interact with the group by asking them questions about your ideas. Then you can pay attention to what they are saying. Bring yourself into the present moment.

When you are in the NOW, you don't get stressed out about success or failure. You just enjoy yourself. This takes practice, so start bringing yourself into the NOW as often as you can.

Now, this is just the tip of the iceberg, so to speak. It's important to work on your mental toughness a little bit every week.

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your friend,
Lisa B.

Advanced Self Help Institute
#106, 527 - 15 Ave SW
Calgary, Alberta  T2R 1R5
Phone: (403) 261-2726
Fax: (403) 261-2725
Email: info@lisabrown.ca